Allons-y!

time check: 4.15am

as expected, i just can't sleep because of my leg. i swear the second thing that i miss the most is to sleep properly.

its always deep in the night where the pain becomes so excruciating

I'M LIVING IN AGONY.

now its not being depressed or whatever, its being totally angry and upset.

and its always deep in the night where suddenly all the stupid mental thoughts will pop out and challenge your will and determination

stupid thoughts like popping down lots of painkillers together with alcohol.

i may be able to survive through this thoughts today, who knows if i'm able to do so tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow. i have completely no idea how much longer my determination and will can last me.

and in another 1 hour and 40 minutes, i'll be preparing to go to school already. perhaps in school, things will be better.

perhaps.